Dana's Magic and Mayhem: November 2014

Wednesday, November 19, 2014

That's SO Wrong.

Dragon Age Inquisition came out yesterday, and as some of you know, my little geeky heart has been waiting for this game FOREVER. So I hopped onto the Origin bandwagon the moment I had my wordcount done, and created my first Inquisitor.

This? Is not her. I'll explain why I didn't post a picture of my Inquistor in a moment.

So I make my happy elven mage, skip her happy elven ass down Inquisition lane, and I'm playing...and I'm playing... and I'm wondering if I'm going to ride the Iron Bull or cast my big eyes toward seducing the ex-Templar, Cullen, when I realize something.

She looks exactly like my grown niece. Down to the cute-ass freckles.

So that means I've been picturing...and the humpty-hump images... and teh BULL...and she was my flower girl at my wedding.

There go four hours of my life I will never get back.

I'll admit, I thought about keeping the character around. I mean, that's four hours of game play I'll have to do over again, not to mention the time I spent in the character creator.

But then I remembered that my brother was a sheriff's officer, owns a gun, and I have the attention span of a gnat. I will wind up posting pictures of my elven Inquisitor at some point, probably with the tag, "BOOYEAH! BAGGED THE BULL!"

Bye-bye, elven Inquisitor. I will miss you.

Favorite Quotes

"I had the right to remain silent, but I didn't have the ability." Ron White

"So let me get this straight. You want me to kill the little guys, kill the big guys, crowd control those I can't, buff the team, debuff the boss, keep myself alive, AND keep you alive, all while waving a stick and dressed in a towel?" - Anonymous Role Playing Gamer

"I think that statue over there is a statement on modern life. The statement is, "Well, shit." - Varric, Dragon Age II

"Why is it all claws and guns? Can't we piss off a fuzzy planet? Still dangerous, but hey. Bunnies." - Joker, Mass Effect

"Last night, I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and thought to myself, "Where the heck is the ceiling?" - Dilbert

"Aim at the high mark and you will hit it. No, not the first time, not the second time and maybe not the third. But keep on aiming and keep on shooting for only practice will make you perfect. Finally you'll hit the bull's-eye of success." - Annie Oakley

"It is only when you fall that you learn whether you can fly." - Flemeth, aka The Witch of the Wilds, Dragon Age 2

"The very existence of flamethrowers proves that sometime, somewhere, someone said to themselves, 'You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I’m just not close enough to get the job done.'” - George Carlin

"I hear there's a wild bridge tournament down the street. And you know Bridge. It's a lot like sex. If you don't have a great partner, you'd better have a good hand." Barry Weiss, Storage Wars

"You know, I used to think it was awful that life was so unfair. Then I thought, wouldn't it be much worse if life were fair, and all the terrible things that happen to us come because we actually deserve them? So, now I take great comfort in the general hostility and unfairness of the universe." - Marcus Cole, Babylon 5, "A Late Delivery From Avalon"

"I aim to misbehave." - Capt. Malcolm Reynolds

"Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid." - Albert Einstein

“If you think you can or think you cannot, you are correct.” - Henry Ford