Tuesday, August 23, 2016

Bad News for a Good Reason

I have news. I won't be going to the Lori Foster Reader & Author Get-Together in 2017.

Yeah, I know. I hate that I have to miss it, but I promise you it's for a very good reason. You see, R, aka Eldest Son, graduates from high school the first day of the Get-Together.

He knows what college he wants to get into, and we think he's got a shot. He got a 1360 on his SAT's on his first try, and he's thinking of taking them again to see if he can do better. I don't know if I should encourage him or give him the "Are you fucking KIDDING ME?!?" look.  

As a writer, I'm sorry I'm going to miss getting to see all of my friends, fellow authors and fans. As a parent, however...

"I got one to semi-adulthood without killing him or bailing him out of jail!"

P.S.: I have every intention of going in 2018, so save me a spot!

Monday, August 15, 2016

Ah, Physical Therapy...

Physical therapy.

It all sounds so easy at first, doesn't it?

"Let's put some heat on that joint, then we'll do a simple massage to work out some of the bad stuff that's built up in the muscle and tendon that you've damaged."

"Then a few simple stretches, working with the resistance bands, and you're done!"

"We'll even give you a few things to do at home that will help a lot."

"Remember, don't overextend your elbow during your nerve stretches."

"We'll set up your next appointment for...wait, where are you going?"

But in reality, if I really did try to quit Dusty would never let me. He'd con me into the car with promises of Starbucks or Dunkin' Donuts, then laugh as we drove off to my torture.

So I get to go again this week, and next week, and the week after...

Favorite Quotes

"I had the right to remain silent, but I didn't have the ability." Ron White

"So let me get this straight. You want me to kill the little guys, kill the big guys, crowd control those I can't, buff the team, debuff the boss, keep myself alive, AND keep you alive, all while waving a stick and dressed in a towel?" - Anonymous Role Playing Gamer

"I think that statue over there is a statement on modern life. The statement is, "Well, shit." - Varric, Dragon Age II

"Why is it all claws and guns? Can't we piss off a fuzzy planet? Still dangerous, but hey. Bunnies." - Joker, Mass Effect

"Last night, I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and thought to myself, "Where the heck is the ceiling?" - Dilbert

"Aim at the high mark and you will hit it. No, not the first time, not the second time and maybe not the third. But keep on aiming and keep on shooting for only practice will make you perfect. Finally you'll hit the bull's-eye of success." - Annie Oakley

"It is only when you fall that you learn whether you can fly." - Flemeth, aka The Witch of the Wilds, Dragon Age 2

"The very existence of flamethrowers proves that sometime, somewhere, someone said to themselves, 'You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I’m just not close enough to get the job done.'” - George Carlin

"I hear there's a wild bridge tournament down the street. And you know Bridge. It's a lot like sex. If you don't have a great partner, you'd better have a good hand." Barry Weiss, Storage Wars

"You know, I used to think it was awful that life was so unfair. Then I thought, wouldn't it be much worse if life were fair, and all the terrible things that happen to us come because we actually deserve them? So, now I take great comfort in the general hostility and unfairness of the universe." - Marcus Cole, Babylon 5, "A Late Delivery From Avalon"

"I aim to misbehave." - Capt. Malcolm Reynolds

"Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid." - Albert Einstein

“If you think you can or think you cannot, you are correct.” - Henry Ford