Sunday, November 11, 2007

I Just Can't Do It

Write angsty stories, that is.

I've tried and tried to do the "Boy meets girl, boy and girl fall in love but both deny it, neither one trusts the other, angst ensues, someone grovels, love prevails, happily-ever-after" but I'm just not built to write it. I either wind up scrapping the project in disgust or giggling in my Cheerios over the melodrama that proceeds to spew from my fingertips. One of the rejection letters I have states that "there is not enough tension between the hero and the heroine".

Meaning they start out liking each other, still like each other in the middle and love each other by the end. Now, this was a few years ago, and I knew even then that they were right. There wasn't enough tension between the hero and the heroine. At least, not for the publishing house I sent it to.

Was I mad when I got the rejection? Nope. I considered it a learning experience. A poor business decision on my part, if you will. I still plan on revamping that novel, fixing it up, making it more the me I am now and resubmitting it to someone else.

Now, don't get me wrong, I love a good angst-ridden story every now and again. Diana Palmer is the ultimate cheesy, angst-ridden cowboy story. I know exactly what I'm going to get when I open a Palmer, and nine point nine times out of ten I'm not disappointed. Pick up a Harlequin? Angst city, but it's like a guilty pleasure: something I like to read, but know I can't write.

Now, give me a kidnapping, or an enemy the hero and heroine must band together to fight, or just a situation where they wind up working together for one reason or another and I'm your girl. Outside threats? Easy! Arguments between said boy and girl that actually gets resolved without resorting to half a book's worth of soul searching and groveling? No problem!

Sobbing into your cappucino because your boyfriend thinks you're a) cheating on him b) you're a liar c) you tried to steal his baby away from him d) an idiot or e) all of the above?


My brain freezes. My fingers turn to mush. My three year old asks me, "Why you bangin' your head on da desk, Mommy?"

I just can't do it.

And you can't make me. Nyah.

Luckily, I don't have to, either. I enjoy what I write, and I'd like to think that comes out in the stories I make up.

I finsihed Cat of a Different Color this week and sent it to my beta readers (and already got a reply back! Damn, Stephanie, you're quick, lol!), and I'm planning on sending it in to the editor by the end of next week. Another Halle Puma, mated. Next I plan on working on Rossetti's Stone for the psychic anthology; hopefully I'll have it done quickly, since they're already starting to invade my sleep. More hopefully, the editor will like it and accept it for the anthology!

Yeah. My only angst is that my characters won't shut up.

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Favorite Quotes

"I had the right to remain silent, but I didn't have the ability." Ron White

"So let me get this straight. You want me to kill the little guys, kill the big guys, crowd control those I can't, buff the team, debuff the boss, keep myself alive, AND keep you alive, all while waving a stick and dressed in a towel?" - Anonymous Role Playing Gamer

"I think that statue over there is a statement on modern life. The statement is, "Well, shit." - Varric, Dragon Age II

"Why is it all claws and guns? Can't we piss off a fuzzy planet? Still dangerous, but hey. Bunnies." - Joker, Mass Effect

"Last night, I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and thought to myself, "Where the heck is the ceiling?" - Dilbert

"Aim at the high mark and you will hit it. No, not the first time, not the second time and maybe not the third. But keep on aiming and keep on shooting for only practice will make you perfect. Finally you'll hit the bull's-eye of success." - Annie Oakley

"It is only when you fall that you learn whether you can fly." - Flemeth, aka The Witch of the Wilds, Dragon Age 2

"The very existence of flamethrowers proves that sometime, somewhere, someone said to themselves, 'You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I’m just not close enough to get the job done.'” - George Carlin

"I hear there's a wild bridge tournament down the street. And you know Bridge. It's a lot like sex. If you don't have a great partner, you'd better have a good hand." Barry Weiss, Storage Wars

"You know, I used to think it was awful that life was so unfair. Then I thought, wouldn't it be much worse if life were fair, and all the terrible things that happen to us come because we actually deserve them? So, now I take great comfort in the general hostility and unfairness of the universe." - Marcus Cole, Babylon 5, "A Late Delivery From Avalon"

"I aim to misbehave." - Capt. Malcolm Reynolds

"Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid." - Albert Einstein

“If you think you can or think you cannot, you are correct.” - Henry Ford