Tuesday, February 12, 2008

I Am SO Not Martha Stewart

I have plans to put some gifts into the Samhain basket for the RT Convention in Pittsburgh this year. For the paranormal gift basket, I'm putting in some jasmine incense and a small incense burner; for the large basket, I'm sending in beautiful sterling silver tiger's eye drop earrings that I lust over and plan on ordering for myself.

So I bought the incense burner today, and it came in a lovely silver tube that I thought, "Gee, I bet I could make something with this!"

snicker snort

Yeah. Right.

So I took off the gluey logo paper that was on the front. Too bad I couldn't get the glue itself off.


I have textured cardstock paper from one of my eldest's school projects! Let's wrap it in that!

Okay, that worked. Mostly. It stuck to the tube, I can tell you that!

So I finish wrapping the lovely silver and glue tube with the lovely black paper, and realize two things:

1) The edges of the black paper are stark white, which looks pretty crappy;
2) On the evenness scale of 1-10? I hit about an 8. Slightly off center.

Oops. Crap.


I'll unwrap a christmas bow and viola! Instant ribbon!

Unfortunately it looked like it had been attacked by my cats, but hey! I can make it work! Right?

snicker snort

I finished my lovely ribbon edges and realized two things:

1) I could still see the white edges down the long side of the paper, because the ribbon only covered top and bottom;
2) It looks kinda like a pipe bomb.

I can fix (part of) that!


Black magic marker along that white edge, and viola! It blends.

Unfortunately, I nicked the rest of the paper in three spots. Shiny black magic marker spots on matte black textured paper.

Dusty peeked over my shoulder and said. "What is that? A pipe bomb?" Then Dusty got that LIGHTBULB! look on his face and added, "Why don't you drill a hole in the top and have one of the incense sticks sticking out, then it will really look real!"

Needless to say, the pipe-bomb-incense-thingy will NOT be making an appearance at RT this year...

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Favorite Quotes

"I had the right to remain silent, but I didn't have the ability." Ron White

"So let me get this straight. You want me to kill the little guys, kill the big guys, crowd control those I can't, buff the team, debuff the boss, keep myself alive, AND keep you alive, all while waving a stick and dressed in a towel?" - Anonymous Role Playing Gamer

"I think that statue over there is a statement on modern life. The statement is, "Well, shit." - Varric, Dragon Age II

"Why is it all claws and guns? Can't we piss off a fuzzy planet? Still dangerous, but hey. Bunnies." - Joker, Mass Effect

"Last night, I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and thought to myself, "Where the heck is the ceiling?" - Dilbert

"Aim at the high mark and you will hit it. No, not the first time, not the second time and maybe not the third. But keep on aiming and keep on shooting for only practice will make you perfect. Finally you'll hit the bull's-eye of success." - Annie Oakley

"It is only when you fall that you learn whether you can fly." - Flemeth, aka The Witch of the Wilds, Dragon Age 2

"The very existence of flamethrowers proves that sometime, somewhere, someone said to themselves, 'You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I’m just not close enough to get the job done.'” - George Carlin

"I hear there's a wild bridge tournament down the street. And you know Bridge. It's a lot like sex. If you don't have a great partner, you'd better have a good hand." Barry Weiss, Storage Wars

"You know, I used to think it was awful that life was so unfair. Then I thought, wouldn't it be much worse if life were fair, and all the terrible things that happen to us come because we actually deserve them? So, now I take great comfort in the general hostility and unfairness of the universe." - Marcus Cole, Babylon 5, "A Late Delivery From Avalon"

"I aim to misbehave." - Capt. Malcolm Reynolds

"Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid." - Albert Einstein

“If you think you can or think you cannot, you are correct.” - Henry Ford