Friday, April 24, 2009

RT 2009, Day Four: I Am A Victim of Comedy

Stephanie Burke tries to get someone to laugh during the Sinfully Sweet party. You laugh, you lose!

So today was both busier and quieter than my other days at RT. At ten-thirty I was stuffing goodie bags with D. Renee Bagby for the Sinfully Sweet Party. Lots of fun and games, prizes, some ick moments and a crap load of cookies that wound up in the trash. The challenge of the mad libs was to read what we'd written without laughing; if you could do that you won a prize. You got a goodie bag just for volunteering. Other games included "Make up the wildest people/sexual position you could think of" (Bill Clinton and GW Bush in a sixty-nine? Really? EW!) and "Write the first line of a book" (which won the grand prize of a one-of-a-kind hat just like ours and a prize bag).

Lunch time saw me grabbing something NOT from the hotel restaurant but from the little cafe off to the side. The egg and cheese croissant sucked pretty badly, but I was starving and about ready to chew off my own hand if I had the right sauce.

Club RT! I got to meet a few people who love the Pumas but weren't aware of Very Much Alive, so I handed out some postcards and got to sign one. An RT volunteer even took a bit of promo, thanks to the lovely Anne Cain covers she saw on my table (Natalie, I promise I'll take Steel Beauty's cover with me next time; I didn't think to bring it!). Then it was off too... a short nap.

I was tired; still am.

Met some of theSamhain/Linden Bay authors, like Bianca d'Arc and Samantha Sommerby, for some wine and cheese with Marty Mathews and Angela James. Lorelei James (no relation) had the most kick-ass cowgirl boots, and one of the worst dance floor stories I'd ever heard.

The vampire ball. What can I say about the vampire ball?

The Vampire Ball dinner show

Um. Hmm. It was sort of Universal Studios meets the Rocky Horror Picture Show with a bit of Rock N' Roll Hall of Fame thrown in for spice. The lead vampire lady sang three times. Van Helsing sang once. And my brain tried to sing itself outta there.

I don't know about you, but when the head vampire lady starts to sing "When I think about you I touch myself", my first thought is "ick." And when the Hulk started playing guitar and Hellboy and Batman looked like they might have a fist fight I focused on my white-sauced chicken, sticky rice and three little tomatoes (they like three tomatoes here for some reason) and tried my best not to watch anymore. I texted Dusty, and he wanted to know what exactly I had been drinking to see V stagger on stage and die at the feet of Harley Quinn while Van Helsing made a pass at the woman in white.

Trust me, there is not enough booze in the world to make me see that. I volunteered.

So I'm back in my room, glad I avoided part two of the "mystery vampire theater". Comfy jammies, a little sangria, and an early night before my last RT event: the giant book fair. I MIGHT do the Mr. Romance contest before going shopping for my kids, so if I do I'll take some pictures.

Mel? So far no one's done anything incriminating, not even Flash. The biggest thing going on is the people next door to me have a screaming match every. Damn. Night. I sense divorce court in their future. Disappointing, isn't it?

Favorite Quotes

"I had the right to remain silent, but I didn't have the ability." Ron White

"So let me get this straight. You want me to kill the little guys, kill the big guys, crowd control those I can't, buff the team, debuff the boss, keep myself alive, AND keep you alive, all while waving a stick and dressed in a towel?" - Anonymous Role Playing Gamer

"I think that statue over there is a statement on modern life. The statement is, "Well, shit." - Varric, Dragon Age II

"Why is it all claws and guns? Can't we piss off a fuzzy planet? Still dangerous, but hey. Bunnies." - Joker, Mass Effect

"Last night, I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and thought to myself, "Where the heck is the ceiling?" - Dilbert

"Aim at the high mark and you will hit it. No, not the first time, not the second time and maybe not the third. But keep on aiming and keep on shooting for only practice will make you perfect. Finally you'll hit the bull's-eye of success." - Annie Oakley

"It is only when you fall that you learn whether you can fly." - Flemeth, aka The Witch of the Wilds, Dragon Age 2

"The very existence of flamethrowers proves that sometime, somewhere, someone said to themselves, 'You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I’m just not close enough to get the job done.'” - George Carlin

"I hear there's a wild bridge tournament down the street. And you know Bridge. It's a lot like sex. If you don't have a great partner, you'd better have a good hand." Barry Weiss, Storage Wars

"You know, I used to think it was awful that life was so unfair. Then I thought, wouldn't it be much worse if life were fair, and all the terrible things that happen to us come because we actually deserve them? So, now I take great comfort in the general hostility and unfairness of the universe." - Marcus Cole, Babylon 5, "A Late Delivery From Avalon"

"I aim to misbehave." - Capt. Malcolm Reynolds

"Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid." - Albert Einstein

“If you think you can or think you cannot, you are correct.” - Henry Ford